笑话1:
儿子:“妈,今天我真高兴,老师对我的看法终于改变了!”
妈妈:“哦,是怎么回事?”
儿子:“以前老师总说我‘不动脑筋’……”
妈妈:“现在呢?”
儿子:“现在,她又说我‘没头脑’!”
笑话2:
石家庄一男子扛三百斤硬币买车。
数完后,发现还差一元。
男子:“算了不买了!”
工作人员。。。
笑话3:
five months older
the second world war had begun, and john wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. so when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.
but john‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. this doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw john‘s papers, he was surprised.
"how old are you?" he said.
"eighteen, sir," said john.
"but your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "are you twins?"
"oh, no, sir," said john, and his face went red. "my brother is five months older than i am."
大五个月
第二次世界大战开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时,他说他已经十八岁了。
可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天,而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时,感到非常惊奇。
“你多大了?”军医问。
“十八,长官。”约翰说。
“可你的哥哥也是十八岁,你们是双胞胎吗?”
约翰脸红了,说:“哦,不是,长官,我哥哥比我大五个月。”
笑话4:
亲戚给我介绍了一个男朋友叫王思聪,重名的。
笑话5:
老师:请用“敌”造句。
学生a:我昨天喝了100吨的敌敌畏,太好喝了。
老师:你给我出去!给你喝100瓶!
笑话6:
岁的男孩亲了同学一下,女孩脸红地说:你耍流氓呀!我要告诉老师去。最后男孩被老师罚站小时才算完。
笑话7:
从前有一只大鱼和一只小鱼。
有一天 小鱼问大鱼:大~鱼~大~鱼~你~平~常~喜~欢~吃~什~么~丫。
大鱼说:我~喜~欢~吃~说~话~慢~的~小~鱼。
然后小鱼说:喔 酱紫 造了!
名言
人生成功的祕密是当一个人的机会来临时,他已为它准备好。
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